Giant leaf-sucking vacuums

Last week it seems the concept of doing away with the giant leaf sucking vacuums was being bandied about by the city.  It really only makes sense.  I, of course, turn all that carbon into compost, and would encourage others to do the same, if they garden. But not everybody like plants, or flowers, or food, or saving the planets, so we can expect everybody to do so.

This is a good example of a service that is nice but unnecessary. People have been raking their lawns for a long time, or paying some neighborhood kid to do it. A newer service like this is kind if cool but not necessary. I bought an electric leaf blower for $25 that can be reversed and used as a mulcher. The biggest pile of leaves can be turned into a pile less than 1/4 of the size in no time at all. Compost them, fill in holes, spread them on your lawn.

In my readings on compost, wide ad varied that they are, I have read about communities starting their own compost piles. IF these leaves were going to something like that then it might be worthwhile, however, I'm pretty sure these are ending up in the landfill.

This could be a good service for someone to get into. A monthly yard waste and non-toxic bio-waste removal (as in everything that is kitchen waste except for meats, bones and oils, the basic non-compostable stuff)with a composting facility where yard waste couple be mulched and mixed with kitchen waste. Stir, add water, and bada-bing. You got yerself a product to sell- compost.

Fucking sleep study

DAMMIT. I have to go back for the SECOND time to that creepy fucking clinic and have wires stuck all over me AGAIN and have some technician monitor me all night so I can spend a thousand fucking dollars on a goddamn machine to help me sleep better.

Or maybe, more pertinently, to make my wife sleep better.

I, of course, won't care if I die in my sleep. I'll be dead. Darkness at the top of the stairs, etc. But my kick-ass wife et al might bum on that, and meanwhile, while I DON'T die in my sleep from Sleep Apnea, my wife wakes up when I start sawing down the rain forest. So fuck it. Hopefully I'll sleep THIS time.

The Works of Paolo Bacigalupi

So far this cat has put out three books, one of which is a collection of short stories ("Pump Six," the title story of which we'll delve into here), one of which is for adults ("The Windup Girl"), and one of which is for young adults ("Ship Breaker").



"The Windup Girl" is certainly the most frightening in some ways as Mr. Bacigalupi's imagination takes off from  the realm of the absolutely possible. The eponymous character is an artificial human or "new person." The "windup" reference is based on the idea that at first glance it is hard to tell the difference between the artificial person and the "real" person, so the designers implant a slightly jerky motion as an identifying factor. In other words, these new people in some ways move like windup toys.

Bacigalupi shows us a world where huge agricultural corporations based in the U.S. have wreaked havoc on the world through genetically modified pests. Those same corporations then sell seeds resistant to those pests, but those seeds are incapable of second generation growth. Easy to see where this is going, and far too easy to believe as a tool of economic warfare.

He also doesn't spare us when it comes to depicting the mistreatment suffered by the Windup Girl at the hands of "real" people.  It is brutal, ugly, and again, all too believable. But Bacigalupi also presents us with a complex political thriller that highlights the bravery (or in some cases obstinacy) of major and minor characters
in a country (Thailand) struggling for survival in a frighteningly real new world.

"Ship Breaker" takes place in the same world as "The Windup Girl," though as a young adult novel Bacigalupi goes easier on the violence. But it is still a dangerous and violent world. The main character is a young kid working the Gulf coast beaches with a "light crew" pulling wiring out of ship hulks. Bacigalupi extrapolates the current talk of returning some shipping to sail into a new age of clipper ships...high tech, hydrofoil ships opening a new age of globalization after the end of oil caused the retreat of the one we are in now. Bacigalupi makes a good YA writer because like the best of those writing for young adults he treats his audience with respect (like Pullman and unlike C.S. Lewis) and provides a great adventure story full of fascinating ideas.

Which does bring me to a brief aside; what is the difference between a YA novel or story and one for adults? Judging from Bacigalupi's writing the devil is in the details. In "The Windup Girl" there is much more grit and a sense of hopelessness. The rape and torture depicted that The Windup Girl herself experiences is not so graphic as to qualify for the "Hostel" series but graphic enough. In "Ship Breaker" when the beautiful "princess" washes ashore we know she is in danger of enslavement, prostitution, rape, and more. The threat is more implicit but feels real enough. Another difference in Bacigalupi's work is that in the YA book there are some heroes; the main character is young enough to be largely without sin (a touchy concept in a world such as ours filled with child soldiers). He is not an addict of the newest super-meth his father is hooked on, nor a drinker like others. He is loyal to his friends and chooses to do the right thing; he is a hero, flawed, imperfect, but a hero.

In "The Windup Girl" there are people who are heroes to their countrymen ("The Tiger of Bangkok" is a former Muy Thai champ turned cop for the Environmental Ministry) but who are fatally flawed by hubris and other sins, and there are a lot of broken people trying to survive, who may not be heroes, but who we can recognize as "that could be me." There are any number of villains, but some of them are acting in what they believe are the best interests of their country and countrymen (ain't THAT always the case). But where there are some black and white issues in "Ship Breaker" (though not without some coloring- our hero remembers his father before the death of his mother and before the onset of addiction as a decent husband and father), there are none in "The Windup Girl." There is, at least, a little bit of justice.

Which is not to say that Bacigalupi is strictly a Dystopian with nothing but negatives to show us.

"Pump Six" is the title story of the collection of short stories and could be considered an homage or reference to "Idiocracy." I know, it's a Wikipedia link, but it works.

In the New York of "Pump Six" our hero is a sewer repairman. He's a hard living guy  with a hot girlfriend who isn't exactly dumb but who has to be reminded that when she smells gas she shouldn't stick her head in the oven and light a match to see what is going on. And she is pretty smart compared to the rest of the people we meet.

One aspect of this New York is that it is overrun by "Trogs." Nobody really knows where these funny looking little humanoids came from. They are naked little crosses between people and toads in appearance, they are all over the place, and they copulate a lot. Our hero has an epiphany when he seeks out the last library in the city (Columbia University) and realizes that college student behavior is no different than Trog behavior. Amidst rains of bricks falling from buildings in disrepair, our hero schleps around trying to figure out how to fix Pump Six and prevent NYC from drowning in its own shit.

Bacigalupi's world-view is bleak and brutal but not hopeless. There is human ingenuity to temper the end of oil, but human greed still reigns as ever. There is heroism to temper that greed and avarice, but heroes fall. The light at the end of the tunnel may be a flickering blue flame from a methane lamp, but the light is still there.

A Very Nice Apocalypse- Justin Cronin's "The Passage"

I think I got a heads up on this book from one of those online retailers always trying to read your thoughts. They turned out to be right.

This is a vampire book, but not your namby-pamby Mormon tweener vampires fruitbats or your trailer park vamps or any of those other loser vampires. This is actually cool.

Cronin does characters, let's get that established right away. Some characters don't even have a spoken line in the book and make only a brief appearance but Cronin is able to create a very cogent idea of who this person is and what makes them tick. Or maybe the key is that your imagination is able to take the crumbs he gives you and fill in the rest. I guess it just depends on what kind of crumbs the author throws you.

So while this is a vampire book and an apocalypse story and while there is plenty of action, it is the parts between the action-which is exciting and well-written, also- that treally makes this book shine.

Cronin's narrative is seemless, even when he jumps a century into the future. We step effortlessly from the end of our world (which ends, at least for some with something like a wimper) into a world of the future that remembers us and is clinging to life using the corroded threads of our knowledge and technology. One of the most masterful constructs in "The Passage" is The Colony.

As a viral plague (of vampirism) is wiping out the U.S., starting at a military base in Colorado, California and Texas both secede. California sets up a series of fortified colonies to keep out the "virals," "jumps," "flyers," "smokes," and "dracs," as they are variously known. The Colony is one of those Cali collectives. By A.V. 92 (92 years after the virus) the residents of the Colony have long lost contact with all of the other colonies and believe they might be the last survivors in the world. Cronin provides us with the Colony's "articles of incorporation" and social structure. There is no mistaking that these people are the good guys; they work hard, and they cherish their "Littles" to the point that they hide them in "the santuary" (a former elementary school) until they reach 8-years-old, to prevent them from knowing the true horror of the world until they are past their formative years.

As the title suggests, this is also a story of a voyage, though the titular reference in this case is a bit deceptive. In any Odyssey, Ulysses has got to meet some weirdos. In this case we get creepy collaborators, Texas tough guys, a stray dog, massacre survivors and a whole nation of ghosts. No disappointments there.

The vampires are not completely sentient. They are glowing, superhumanly strong gargoyles, occasionally with shreds of their former identity clinging to their new bodies, like a bunch of rings stuck on the fingers of what was previously an old woman, or a shock of ragged, dyed red hair. Through one major character, we hear their thoughts, which mostly consist of "Who am I?" with fleeting glimpses of the people they once were. So these vamps ain't sexy, but they are oddly sympathetic as well as scary.

And the great thing is, there is so much more going on between the characters; love, rivalry, hatred, grief, loss, hope, it's all there.

I do hope that this isn't the start of a trilogy or something though. It would be like "Stephen King's The Stand II." The story is told here in as complete a fashion as it needs to be told. This is a vampire apocalypse book that is epic in scope and character, with battles, heroes, villains, the works, but it completely avoids becoming pulp (pulp is great, but everything doesn't have to be pulp) fiction of the sort that rehashes the same characters in the same or similar situations over and over. If Mr. Cronin's resume serves as any indicator his next book will be nothing like this one, but then again, with the mad skills he's showing here, if it is a sequel, he may have some new tricks to show us yet..